At first, I thought it was typical penis-pill spam. You know the type: “Iron rod now!!!!!! 87% OFF FOR MAY! FREE SHIPPING!!!!”
As patterns go, it’s a pretty predictable one: some stupid erection analog with exclamation points (‘Erections!’ he ejaculated. Sorry. Free associating.) followed by some discount that’s never a number you ever see when actually, you know, shopping (94% off! 86% discount! 97%!!! Who discounts stuff at 97%? At that point, why not the age-old favorite “Hey kid, first one’s free.”?) followed by promises of discretion or free shipping or whatever else it takes to get you to click on their links.
Still, this one didn’t quite fit the pattern: “Shofars 60% OFF + FREE Delivery”
Lots of caps, a discount, free shipping, and a reference to a long, hard, pointy thing. But shofars? That’s pretty esoteric for spammers. So I had to open it… How could I not?
And lo! It really was for shofars. So, add to your list of dirty rotten spambags the Israeli company Israel-Catalog.com. Evidently, lots of businesses share their mailing address, so I’m guessing that’s an Israeli version of Mailboxes, Etc.
Hey, since they had to have sent this late Friday night their time, isn’t it forbidden to spam on Shabbat? Or is a bot net for spamming more like the Sabbath elevators, and therefore not really work? Or maybe they’ve contracted with a Shabbat goy to send the spam…
Ah, questions for the ages!